Life seems to have taken a standstill...looking for answers to questions which are waging a war in my head..
The feeling of emptiness is overwhelming...a huge vacuum...to be filled-up in time but in what form I can't say..hopefully it would be a positive end-result...But till then my mind is dreaming wide-awake....and dreaming of nightmares...and I'm screaming in those dreams..
I want to calm down...but its not so easy..I try to look for things to keep myself busy...but I'm not a machine after all..I need rest and the moment by body fatigues itself from work, my mind starts riding the waves of Emotions - anger, frustration, hurt, pride, ego, sarcasm, etc. etc. all of it one after the other...a vicious cycle..you can call it 'brain-storming' I guess (HA!)
Tried everything...from booze to weed...but my mind has become far superior to be mellowed in this fashion...smart mind huh! I don't know what is right and what is wrong...I don't know whether what I'm doing or going to do is right or wrong..
How much can you be patient and keep waiting for the so-called "right time" to come..and when the time does come are you sure its going to be right!!
The worst part is I'm writing this being totally sober...now can you imagine my state-of-mind??!!
YOU CAN'T.....
